Last time we found out that on a resume, I can position the lowly job of “raking the sandbox” as “Leveling the Playing Field.”  This is no joke, and it will be beneficial to advancing my (somewhat dubious) career. Whatever that career is.

In today’s installment, we take the concept of resume enhancement even further, with a much more specific enhancement, and satisfying results:

The sign on the cave tour guide shack says, “B Guide- bury fossils”.  This, too, is no joke. If we provide hidden fossils for kids to discover, then they will smile, and we have a “Mission Accomplished” scenario.

So I go out to the giant sandbox early in the day with a bag of fossils in my hand. I ponder all the nuances of planting fossils, sip my coffee, study the lay of the land and begin.

I dump all of the fossils next to the kiddie sand strainers, smoosh them into the sand with my foot, and walk away. “Mission Accomplished”.

We never had “Fossil Planting- 101” at the college I graduated from.

So I begin the task of turning this little ritual into a career-rocketing resume enhancement entry:

“Director of Paleontological Discoveries.”

“As DOPD, I was responsible for all fossil finds within the Park boundaries, on the days I was scheduled. Fossils ranged from the Dramamine Era, to the later Starbucks Epoch.”

I worked in close proximity to the paleontoligists and elicited suggestions at the sponsored digs.

What’s next?