Today I heard part of a speech where Barack  Obama was championing civil rights. To paraphrase part of that speech, here is what he declared: “because of what happened when they marched over that bridge, a white girl and a black man could have a child, and Barack Obama Jr. was born.”

Republicans are saying that President Obama is ignorant on civil rights and American history, because of the fact that he was born before that march. But that couldn’t be true, because he’s a Harvard graduate, and you know how hard it is to get a Harvard degree these days.

Using sophisticated detective techniques, I found out why he said what appears to be a gaffe.

He’s got a time machine.

You’re looking at the world’s first photo of the plans for that machine at the top of the page.

Using the time machine, Barack Obama Jr. went back in history, saw that civil rights march happen, and said, “I’ll have myself born before the march, knowing what a great place America is going to become in the past.”

Pure genius.

It’s no wonder he was able to graduate from Harvard and not have to release his university transcripts.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to hop into that time machine and see who I should have voted for coming up back in 2012. This is going to be easy.