We had just skied down one of the most difficult chutes in the Aspen area and were taking a break. Milan was taking photos of the descent route, and everyone was pumped. We were still standing on a “double black diamond run”, but this spot was not the steepest.
As a ski instructor, you get to see the most beautiful scenery, tackle the most difficult challenges, and meet the most interesting people. Saxon and Milan were two of those people. They were two more guys in a litany of crazy Aussies- Australians who have been in my ski classes. Saxon liked digging snow caves (he skied with a shovel and survival gear) and Milan liked dropping off of rocks.
The short rest break was over, and it was time to ski. “Watch out over there.” I said. “That big black crater is a ‘bomb’ hole.” A bomb hole is what is left when the Ski Patrol throws dynamite to try and start an avalanche. In this case, the snow was already stable enough (even though we were standing in 12 inches of powder) to not slide.
“I’m going to ski through it,” Saxon said.
“OK,” I replied, “But don’t fall into it, you’ll get chemical tangents all over you.”
“What do you mean?” Saxon asked.
“The residue from the dynamite will stick to your ski clothes. If you wear that outfit when you fly home, and there are ‘bomb sniffing’ machines at the airport, you’ll set them off!”
Next thing I know, Saxon is rolling in the bomb crater, laughing, and picking up blackened snow and rubbing it all over his body. So much for the avoidance idea.
My ski school clients have the wackiest lessons you’ve ever seen. One time I had two teen brothers from the east coast. We duct-taped a smoke bomb onto a ski pole and skied a crazy zig zag through a crowded trail near the bottom of the mountain. We’ve dug snow caves, roasted marshmallows, launched hot dogs on bottle rockets, somersaulted off of cornices, skied through chest-deep powder, dropped off of frozen waterfalls, over water ponds, and occasionally learned something. Just kidding. You will always learn something in my class.
I love teaching skiing to people who’ve never even seen snow before. I do it a lot. To paraphrase the once famous mountain guide, Gaston Rebufet: “The joy I found when first ascending the peaks is now renewed every time I guide someone into the mountains and I see the joy and wonder on their faces.”
You can now book me for private ski lessons online. The process is really easy. Check out my ski homepage. Come to Aspen and ski with me. It’ll be your best trip ever. Trust me, I’m your guide.
Cheers,
Jerry “Mad Max” Begly